by Christopher Moore. About the Book. The birth of Jesus has been well chronicled, as have his glorious teachings, acts, and divine sacrifice. Read “Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal”, by Christopher Moore online on Bookmate – The birth of Jesus has been well chronicled. Christopher Moore's books; Lamb, Fool and A Dirty Job are vicarious rides through Lamb is the gospel of Joshua (Jesus is Greek for Joshua) told by his best.
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Author: Christopher Moore Moore, Christopher - Lamb, the Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal. Read more. Chapter One. You think you know how this story is going to end, but you don't. Trust me, I was there. I know. The first time I saw the man who would save the. The birth of Jesus has been well chronicled, as have his glorious teachings, acts, and divine sacrifice after his thirtieth birthday. But no one knows about.
Customers who bought this item also bought. This one cut into my sleep, but it was so worth it! Jesus is the Greek translation of the Hebrew Yeshua, which is Joshua. Get to Know Us. The boy took the lizard from his mouth and handed it to his younger brother, who sat beside him in the sand. A Dirty Job:
The younger boy played with the lizard for a while, teasing it until it reared its little head as if to bite, then he picked up a rock and mashed the creatures head. Into his mouth went the lizard, and before I could accuse, out it came again, squirming and alive and ready to bite once again. He handed it back to his younger brother, who smote it mightily with the rock, starting or ending the whole process again. By the way, his name was Joshua. Jesus is the Greek translation of the Hebrew Yeshua, which is Joshua.
Christ is not a last name. Christ stood for. I am Levi who is called Biff. No middle initial. Joshua was my best friend. In the last three days I have seen more people, more images, more wonders, than in all my thirty-three years of living, and the angel asks me to ignore them.
Yes, I have been given the gift of tongues, so I see nothing without knowing the word for it, but what good does that do? Did it help in Jerusalem to know that it was a Mercedes that terrified me and sent me diving into a Dumpster? Moreover, after Raziel pulled me out and ripped my fingernails back as I struggled to stay hidden, did it help to know that it was a Boeing that made me cower in a ball trying to rock away my own tears and shut out the noise and fire?
Am I a little child, afraid of its own shadow, or did I spend twenty-seven years at the side of the Son of God? Do not be afraid. You have a holy mission and I will protect you. Smug bastard. Had I known what he would do to me I would have hit him again. Even now he lies on the bed across the room, watching pictures move on a screen, eating the sticky sweet called Snickers, while I scratch out my tale on this soft-as-silk paper that reads Hyatt Regency, St.
Louis at the top.
Words, words, words, a million million words circle in my head like hawks, waiting to dive onto the page to rend and tear the only two words I want to write. There were fifteen of us — well, fourteen after I hung Judas — so why me? Joshua always told me not to be afraid, for he would always be with me.
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Practical Demonkeeping Pine Cove Book 1. Christopher Moore. A Novel. Island of the Sequined Love Nun. A Dirty Job: Editorial Reviews Amazon.
Lucky for us that Christopher Moore presents a funny, lighthearted satire of the life of Christ--from his childhood days up to his crucifixion--in Lamb: This clever novel is surely blasphemy to some, but to others it's a coming-of-age story of the highest order.
A childhood pal of the savior is brought back from the dead to fill in the missing year "gap" in the Gospels in Moore's latest, an over-the-top festival of sophomoric humor that stretches a very thin though entertaining conceit far past the breaking point. See all Editorial Reviews. Product details File Size: Would you like to tell us about a lower price?
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Thank you for your feedback. Share your thoughts with other customers. Write a customer review. Customer images. See all customer images. Read reviews that mention christopher moore dirty job sense of humor laugh out loud san francisco ever read beta male charlie asher missing years gospel according death merchant thought provoking wise men bloodsucking fiends highly recommend childhood pal according to biff christ from his childhood son of god minty fresh.
Top Reviews Most recent Top Reviews. There was a problem filtering reviews right now. Please try again later. Kindle Edition Verified Purchase. A friend who manages a bookstore tried to turn me on to this offering two years ago and it took me this long to get around to reading it. Now I'm kicking myself for not doing so earlier. In an era where so much of what is published or self-published is utter crap, it's good to know there are still a few authors taking the time to craft brilliant, enjoyable stories.
For the first time in a long time, I had a hard time putting a book down. This one cut into my sleep, but it was so worth it! I'm sure I'll be reading everything this author has in print within the next few months. One caveat, however: It's intended -- at least in part -- as parody, but I'm guessing not everyone is going to get the joke. This story tries to imagine the big gap that occurs between Jesus' birth and his the years of public ministry. Told from the modern day perspective of Jesus' best friend, the book portrays the Messiah as that perfect kid you couldn't even hate because he is just too good.
The book doesn't espouse any philosophy or dogma, but it also refrains from making fun of the beliefs of Judaism or Christianity in anything but an affectionate way. If you have an affection for religion without taking it too seriously, you might find this an enjoyable read.
I sure did.
This book was given to me by my son-in-law. When I started reading it I did not understand why he would give me such a strange book? I could not get into it. But I did not want to disappoint him so I resolved to at least give it a try. Since I love audio books, I added audio to this book and voila, the book took a totally new meaning.
I love the narrator Fisher Stevens and listening to him brought the book to live. The book is funny and sweet and strange and I loved Charlie Asher. She is being cared for by two immigrant ladies Chinese and Russian. The talent of Fisher Stevens is so great that all character voices and accents are tailored to the characters, recognizable and in case of babysitters very funny because they were so real sounding.
Charlie Asher is identified as Beta male, which according to the book description is dependable, loyal, responsible and sensible individual. Since Charlies wife Rachel died right after Sophie was born, Charlie is raising her himself and she is the most important person in his life, but his job sometimes takes him away from Sophie under most unusual circumstances. The writing is very good.
The dialogue between the different characters is so real and entertaining that it reminded me of my own family gatherings. And the ending did not disappoint. As a Catholic I had some "hang ups" when I first read it. I told the friend that recommended it to me that is was certainly NOT my cup of tea. He is not particularly spiritual or Christian. He told me this was the book that GOT him to read the whole bible.
He laughed and cried through the whole book "Lamb" he said So I put my "thoughts" on a shelf and read it. I laughed and I cried. I am heart broke the book is finished.
The kind of heart broke that you feel when your favorites TV series has its last show of its last season and no more will be made EVER. How WILL you go on is how one feels. When I come upon certain stories in the bible that were talked about in this book "Lamb", the stories Biff, Jesus childhood friend refers too, I laugh and remember Biffs spin on it cause he was supposedly there and he told it His way. It gives me the feeling of belonging that I feel I know something that no one else knows.
I huger to read more of the bible now just to keep that feeling.
Yes I know which is the real and which is from the book Lamb. I just like feeling of belonging now. I am a devout Christian I also appreciate good writing and a person's effort and sense of humor.
Moore has clearly done a lot of research into the Jewish ways of life and all sorts of things in the time period when Jesus lived.
He said mixed it with some imagination and well meant humor. I loved the book! He went wild with it and i loved every minute of it Paperback Verified Purchase.